No way I say. Complete denial? Or just too damn stubborn to give into my age…
Operating on a very low energy level, having fatigue, frustration, irritability, low sex drive (yes I said that), for me that is a huge one! I can’t sleep and go from 0-60 with major hot flashes, and to top it off, weight gain. As I look down at my scale I see a poof around my waist. Where did that come from?
Let me just dive into this with you.
I’m normally the happy-go-lucky sunshine maker with so much energy. When I looked down in shock at the scale in the middle of the pandemic I just thought it was the comfort food and cocktails that added on that extra covid-15, as in the extra fifteen pounds I gained. Even though I have been struggling with my weight yo-yoing for two years now. When the pandemic hit, I noticed my energy level took a dive but I wasn’t depressed, in fact, I was thankful for this huge timeout to stop and reflect on every aspect of my life.
I was now producing and directing for CHC.
So when it was time to start up production of the shows I felt like I had to muster up all the energy I had just to hold up a conversation. I was forgetful and couldn’t articulate correctly. I even got to the point where I would forget where I parked or where I left my cell phone. My reading glasses went missing constantly only to find them on top of my head.
So one day I self-diagnosed it as low-grade depression, (big mistake) because I refuse to give in to my age, not in a million years would I be going through menopause, right! When I looked up my symptoms I thought I was just way too young for that. I mean I still get carded at the store standing next to my Lifestyle Manager who happens to be 25 years old.
So when it got to the day when I couldn’t get out of bed and I was crying my eyes out, I called my western doctor.
The following week they ran a panel of tests and BAM there it was just as my naturopathic Doctor had thought. I was diagnosed with Thyroid disease. And wait for it, and yes the M-word, menopause. Do you know that my western doctor had the nerve to tell me that my uterus was “shut down”? Wait, what!?
I can still hear those words echoing in my head. No way, I say, there is no way that my petals of pureness was out of business. I mean this redhead was as energetic as a 28-year-old but felt depleted of all that energy overnight! How can this be happening to me? No one ever told me this would happen. Since I lost my mother at the age of sixteen, I had no idea what to expect.
The next day I looked into the mirror and said to myself, girl you got this!
So there I was researching as much as I could because I live a holistic organic life, I was determined not to be on anything that altered my state of mind even knowing I was feeling desperate. I wasn’t satisfied with the protocol from my western doctor. A couple of weeks passed and I took off to visit friends that I haven’t seen in 9 months and spent overdue time on the beach. And there were the answers I was desperately looking for right in front of me.
Two girlfriends shared their experiences with me. I will call them Maggie and Hilda to respect their privacy. I’m staying with Maggie and she starts to share with me what she has done to help herself with the change of life and the next day she surprises me with the presence of Hilda, our artist friend who is so funny and can keep you entertained for days on end with stories. I laughed so much my stomach muscles ached.
Such great medicine.
So here I am with my feet in the sand and Hilda asked, “How the heck are you, Kerry!” At that moment I felt safe and space was held for me to open up with my world of creation of what direction CHC was going and my health that had put a snag in it. Before I knew it Hilda started to tell me a pocket full of knowledge all about menopause and her experience, right down to the lining of her vaginal walls thinning and how sex started to hurt her.
I felt for the first time, in a long time that I wasn’t alone in fact I was rejuvenated with all this knowledge of how I could heal myself holistically. The first day I got back home I was on my phone contacting my holistic doctor. I scanned her all my tests and within 24 hours I had stuff waiting for me at the compound pharmacy. She even gave me something to start repairing my thyroid. I call this divine intervention, being at the right place at the right time and who you know.
The fountain of youth is happening.
I already can’t believe I was operating on such a low energy level. Just WOW. I’m so grateful for my friends that understood me and got me through this tough time. I feel amazing. No more hot flashes. My energy is quickly coming back and I am sure I’m driving my Lifestyle Manager crazy with my new lists of creations that are flowing through me. I can feel my juices flowing again. I will never give in to the snags in my life. I am an alchemist, so when the going gets tough, I will find a way. I promise you that.
Special thank you to my naturopathic doctor, Dr. Danni Ballere! You saved me and mine.
In a comfortable state of gratitude,
Kerry Romano Zall