Marilyn Harder The time I spend in loving application of makeup, to me, is the equivalent of bringing myself flowers.
A bouquet of flowers may not be an act of love for everyone! And then it’s easy to understand that make-up/make-up application may too not be your forte. For some, the application of make-up makes them feel less authentic – like they are wearing a mask and hiding from the world. Or even further, a tool of repression to force women to comply with the archetypal beauty standard set up by a cultural framework that places an inherent ranking of societal value based upon the relative judgment of each person’s aesthetic beauty. And for those who are in the latter – I encourage you to just read on and observe with curiosity my perspective and take – that make-up CAN be an act of love.
For me, the art of make-up application has become a symbolic gesture of love and tenderness, and a ritual of spiritual and self-connection.
The best part of make-up for me is not about changing the way I look for anyone, nor enhancing my features. But it is the tender time I spend with myself in the mirror, in loving kindness. I spend the time looking in the mirror, into my own eyes, and smile with appreciation, and in the end, I feel worthy of my time and effort. When I explore different application techniques that I don’t have quite right, I commit to myself the practice and research to learn more, and to be better FOR myself.
This commitment translates to many other areas of self care in my life – cooking healthy meals, moving my body, taking pride in my home, my space and prioritizing my time. My make-up ritual SLOWS me down at the start of my day and infuses patience in how I approach challenges of the day. My time spent with myself is infused with centering, self care and pride. I catch my reflection throughout the day and I radiate my power. I feel pride in the artistry of new eye shadow combinations, and I find myself as interesting to look at as a painting on the wall.
For those that wonder, Yes, I do feel these things without make-up as well.
However, that extra time I spend, in the mirror, just for me projects my centeredness for the day. The days I start in purposeful ritual and meet my own eyes, are the days I feel most authentic. I feel pride swelling in my chest at my patience with myself, my progress in my skill, my ease, comfort, and loving grace with my naturally aging skin, laugh lines and smile wrinkles. I spend time in gratitude for the time I spend on my skincare, the water I drink, and the way I care for myself.
For me, gazing into my own eyes is the best time I spend all day. I am inherently beautiful from the inside out. I was beautiful when I was awkward at 12, overweight, giant glasses larger than my cheeks, with curly hair so stiff with gel, it crunched when I touched it. I was beautiful with tears running down my face after ugly crying for hours, not showering for days, and deep in grief after my dad died when I was 24. I was beautiful when my face was nearly unrecognizable from hives. But the difference then, I avoided my reflection. I avoided my eye contact, I avoided mirrors. And I avoided the TRUTH. Looking into my own eyes reminds me daily of this truth. And you should hear it too.
YOU are inherently beautiful. I can’t say that often enough. Your beautiful soul radiates through your eyes, and when you are living authentically in spiritual alignment you GLOW.
And that is why EYES are my favorite place to enhance with make-up – especially these days where your eyes are often your only avenue of communication in a sea of masks. In the words of Tyra Banks – you have to rock that SMIZE! (The smile that radiates through the eyes).
To get the most out of your mascara AND the lashes that God blessed you with – these are my BEST tips and my FAVORITE products!
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CURL YOUR LASHES:
- Curl your lashes prior to mascara application and get an extra extreme lift to the lash! The more lash you see, the brighter your eyes look! There are TONS of eyelash curlers on the market – here are my favorite two!
- It’s super easy to use—the grippy handle stops any slippage—and my lashes stay curled forever.
- This one is wider and curls the shorter/straighter lashes better! And fits all eye shapes.
- Heat up your eyelash curler for 10 seconds with a blow dryer prior to curling for an extra curl and lift
MASCARA TIPS:
- Pick a mascara that is safe and non-toxic! Your eyes are an open mucous membrane and more apt to absorb toxic ingredients than your skin, so you need to be the most vigilant with products on your eyes and lips. Choose mascara formulations free from parabens, propylene glycol, retinyl acetate (vitamin A acetate), aluminum powder & coal tar dyes – both loaded with heavy metals, formaldehyde-releasing preservatives, BHT, BHA, and fragrances.
- My FAVORITE mascara is Younique Twisted Epic Mascara – it’s innovative with TWO wands – both a small wand for application to lift and separate each lash and a large wand to add length and volume. The nourishing formula strengthens the lashes at the root and is the ONLY mascara I’ve ever used that doesn’t melt off my lashes onto the eyelids. https://www.youniqueproducts.com/MarilynHarder/products/view/US-11102-13#.YD6jccA74lQ
- I also recommend the Ecco Bella FlowerColor Plant-Based Vegan Mascara. Its clean Vegan formula is great for even the most sensitive eyes.
- When you pull your wand out for the first few applications , go really slow as you pull out the wand – you may also want to gently brush off any excess of mascara that may be on the wand . If you leave those on there , you will waste product and over apply leading to chunky, clumpy lashes.
- Don’t pump the wand in the tube! It dries out the mascara prematurely. Instead, swirl and rotate the wand to pick up product as needed.
- CLEAN your mascara wand every few weeks. Rinse the mascara wand under hot water until the water runs clear. This will help eliminate dried chunky mascara on the wand AND minimize bacteria in the tube/in the eyes.
APPLICATION TIPS:
- Gently back spin the wand and wiggle the brush right to left as you roll from the base of the lashes to tips. Keep applying until your desired length and look is achieved! This will help create extreme length! (Embedded video)
- Comb the lashes to help separate and lift the lashes from the top down. I love a wide toothed metal comb!
- On the days you want extra length and volume, coat the lashes from the top, let dry for 30 seconds and then from the bottom up. Multiple coats will add length and volume, but be sure to leave at least 30 seconds between coats and comb/separate the lashes.
- For an extra lift, consider a cool shot of air from the blow dryer, from under the lashes/ bottom up after application for an extra long/all day lift!
Remember – no matter what you choose (or dont choose) for mascara or make-up, spend time gazing into your own eyes each day. You are worth it!
